Stuck in the Space

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When I was pregnant with Nelle, we started talking to a contractor about putting an addition on our house.  We knew what the additional space would look like, how much it would cost, and had a contract in hand.  I was going back and forth with the contractor on some of the particulars of the agreement when Nelle died. Continue reading

A Day of Subtle Reminders

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I was at a conference in San Antonio this week, and it was long and exhausting.  After arriving home late on Wednesday evening, Thursday seemed like a day to take it easy.  Ger and I went out to lunch at a tiny restaurant that featured wine and small plates.  I had first been there years ago with a book club that I had joined when we first moved to Illinois, and many times since with friends.  It was Ger’s first time at the restaurant. Continue reading

Sharing Their Stories

2019-04-18 Sharing Their Stories

When an invitation comes up to speak on parent panels at one of the local hospitals, I always volunteer.  These panels are part of the SHARE program and educate hospital medical staff on how to care for patients like me, dealing with the death of their child.  The staff – nurses and techs usually, from both Labor and Delivery and Mother-Baby – go through the “information” part of the class first, learning about the bereavement program to support parents, but then the parents are invited into the room to speak and tell their stories.  The stories we share communicate the experience in a way that no Power Point can. Continue reading

History on Fire

2019-04-16 History on Fire

I have never been to Paris, but it is on my bucket list, along with so many other cities around the world.  I have family vacation destinations planned for our family every summer from now until 2029 (anyone who knows me personally will laugh and say “of course”) and the trips when my kids are high school and college-aged include Europe. Continue reading

Don’t Let the Moment Slip Away

2019-04-10 Don't Let the Moment Slip Away

I have had some people come into my life recently that don’t know that I lost two babies.  I interact with them a lot, and for months I have wondered when it will come up.  I wasn’t avoiding the topic, but it isn’t something that necessarily arises in casual conversation either.  Yet I knew – when the moment presented itself, I would say something. Continue reading