The Time Before and After

This winter has been so long, and rough.  We haven’t had everyone in school for a full week since before Christmas.  Between illnesses, snow days, or planned days of no school for an in-service or parent teacher conferences, every week feels like we are cobbling the days together and lacking the fluidity of our normal routine.  On Sunday evening I said to Ger “This is it – this is going to be our first week of ‘normal.” Continue reading

Sickness Mixed with Memories

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Last night, my body felt foreign to me.

I have always had a sensitive stomach, and sometimes certain foods – whether by preparation, flavors, age, or some other unknown forces – cause my stomach to go into revolt.  Yesterday evening was one of those times.  After our fairly uninteresting dinner of gnocchi, marinara sauce, and garlic toast, I began to feel queasy, culminating in racing to the bathroom to vomit. Continue reading

A Normal Visit

2017-11-13 A Normal Visit

I had my annual female exam today.  First time I have been in my OB/GYN office in over two-and-a-half years for a non-pregnancy related visit.  My first visit when I was pregnant with Nelle would have been around May of 2015, when I was about 8 weeks pregnant.  The exact date is not important to anyone but me.  It was a bit surreal, to walk into that building and know that there would be no discussion of medications, or risk factors, or how many weeks along I was. Continue reading

Six Weeks and Weary

2017-09-21 Six Weeks and Weary

My six-week postpartum appointment was this morning.  It felt like a definitive “end” to such a long journey.  No more pregnancy-related appointments, ever.  I spent time picking out what to wear, as if I wanted to convey “See?  Even five years older, tired, and dealing with a baby after loss, I can still bounce back!”  The medical staff would not even notice my effort.  It was more of an assurance for myself. Continue reading